Teach me to LOVE

Assalamualaikum and how do you do people?
Yeah, I know. Boredom is my roomate. I've been laying my bed, staring like crazy at my laptop watching Modern Family for thousands time. Seriously, it's like my eyes can go blind caused by the never-switched-off laptop.

Oh, by the way, my parents sent me the latest video of my cutie cats. I really wish I can fly and go there right now, and cuddle them nonstop. I really missed them soooo much. Words are not enough to show how much I missed them. My family and my cats. Sobsob.

So, L-O-V-E. That's what I'm going to talk (or rambling) about tonight. Yeah, yeah, it is a bit cliche' and whatnot, but seriously, it has a veryyyyy UNIVERSAL meaning. Love is soooo wide, that even a simple act can means love. So, careful people. Maybe your intention is good, but the other person might got the wrong signal. Talk about broken radar, right?

I used to be in love. I used to fall in love sooo many times. And my heart used to have this scars all over it, and pain is not a big issue anymore. I guess, that is why we call it as 'Falling In Love'. It makes you fall without you even know that there is a floor waiting for you, called 'REALITY'. And I remind you, if you are not careful, that fall can cost you a lot. A lot.

So, during that period of me falling in love and whatever, somehow the relationship never lasts longer. I mean, the longest was like a year and a half. But on that time also, millions of fights and tears accompanied us. I really don't understand it. Is it me or is it him? Or I'm cursed?

Eventually, I grew afraid to fall in love again. It's this scary path where one day you are the happiest girl in the world, and the next day you can be the most unlucky girl in the world. Just like that. With a blink of eyes, man! And it sucks. Literally. I hate to face that period where we have to cry evrytime, watch lame love stories and cried, eat chocolates and cried. Enough means enough! So I guess that is why, I put a wall, like a brickish wall, around my heart and my emotions. Seriously. So now, I am like a walking zombie, except the (wohhhhh) zombie sound and the eating-flesh part.

I know, I am soooo dysfunctional just because of love. A human love. But then, I realised something. Now, I am farrrr more closer to my family, my siblings, my grandparents and my relatives. I have time to come home at least once a month and help my parents with the chores. And I have time to spend with my sisters and we are moreeee closer than we used to be.

Back then, during my immature and selfish years ( yeah, I am sooo old now), I used to neglect my family. I don't bother to call them, and if I called them, it's either asking for more money or just asking for more money. Yeah, I am soooo stupid. My sisters, I don't really care about them because I was to busy burying my face, texting to my so-called boyfie all the time. I spent time more with my friends
( ex-friends, to be exact) and I just became this zombie, with the zombie sound and the eating-flesh stuff. Yeah, a mean zombie!

When I sat down and think about the past, wow, I am soooo selfish. Wanting my own freedom, neglecting my responsibility and for what? For an episode that ends in crying and crying and being sad and cavey inside my room. It is useless, so damn useless and stupid, not to forget.

Now, I am more happy. Feeling full about myself. Sure there is downside in it. I am alone a lot of time, spending time playing Call Of Duty and screaming 'Die, Die, Die', and eventually just staying in the room forever. But it is nice. You wanna know why? The perks are, I don't have to spend my money on stupid things anymore. I can save them up and later, buy anything that I want. I don't have to sleep late anymore. I can get my beauty sleep and hello beautiful skin and better body! And the important thing is, I can save myself for my true love one day. The one that Allah reserving for me. And I have this ample time to prepare myself, get closer to Him, and just focus on what is important first.

I have found my inner peace. And once you find it, there is no more obstacles or trials that can bring you down. You can smile when it's raining and you can be happy when there is a storm. Because, whoever get closer to Allah, Allah will always takes a good care on you, And His promises are true.

So, if you ask me how to love somebody, well I would say, Love Your Creator First. Then you can love yourself and from there on, the good aura will attract someone that might be the one He already planned for you. Simple as that. But remember, it takes a lot of patience and hard work because all the good things happened not in a blink of eyes.

I feel lucky, so lucky. I'm reserving my heart for someone that is right for me one day and if that's not going to happened now, well, let's meet together in Jannah. Be positive. I may be lonely, but it's a good kind of loneliness.

So to all ladies and gentlemen out there, be patient. Love is soooooo universal that even caring about your cats can be considered as love. So find your inner peace. Repair your connection with Allah. Be thankful to be alive today. When the time is right, Love itself will come running into your arms.
In shaa allah. Put your trust in Allah.

And, Love here is not between human-human only. It can be between us and the nature, animals and also our religion. It can be between our families, friends and maybe our ummah, the people around us. So, go and spread some love. Like our Prophet Muhammad S.A.W.

And cleanse yourself from hatred, revenge, and vengeance. Brush all that Mazmumah dusts away and plant seeds of Mahmudah all over your mind and body. You can see the difference soon.

Not to forget, mend your aims. Life is not about falling in love and settling down. It has more meaning than that. So think out of the box and set your aims, not only in this world, but also towards Akhirat! Remember that.

Don’t care of what people may say about you, remember that Maryam ‘alaiha assalam not got married and she is the only woman who has a whole Surah with her name!
So if not having a husband is a defect,she wouldn’t has been mentioned in Qur’an!  Not getting married is not a flaw or a defect but not maintaining chastity is. The real defect is that a woman doesn’t preserve her purity and chastity. Be patient and be sure that ALLAH will reward you greatly for your patience at the end this Duniya is not about men or getting married but about submitting your will peacefully to ALLAH and accept what ever HE degrees for you. Be patient and believe in His timing. Faith in ALLAH includes faith in His timing. Whether it’s now or later, ALLAH knows better!

So go live your life to the fullest, but according to Al-Quran and Sunnah. Surely you will be happy, even in heaven afterwards!

May Allah grants us happiness and barakah, not only in this world, but hereafter also. May He protects us from sins that we, ourselves conducted. Amin :)

Assalamualaikum and good night beautiful people  <3 p="">

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